An Open Letter to Passengers and Employees of the MBTA

I have been riding the T for the majority of my life. From childhood trips with my grandmother and teen excursions with my friends to college classes and ultimately, work. Even when I lived in the North End, I would take the T whenever I was too lazy or too late or too cold/hot to walk. I often fantasize about never having to ride the T again and here’s why.

Let’s begin with the train conductors, shall we? HELLO! Please refrain from yelling at passengers when you are in a bad mood. We understand that some people are annoying and inconsiderate, but displaying your contempt vocally over the loudspeakers is offensive to us all and spreads the negativity. Also, is it really necessary to close the doors in our faces? I mean, I know that you’re on a schedule, (that’s a really funny statement to those who ride the T) but I’m sure you could wait 1 second for those of us running for the doors to get on the train. Just sayin’. The same goes for bus drivers. If we’re running for the bus and it’s 12 degrees, could you give us 30 seconds to get to the stop? Don’t tell me you didn’t see me flailing my arms and running at top speed in my heels. I find it intriguing that both the conductors and bus drivers appear to have ample time to chat with their buddies or flirt with members of the opposite sex. To those employees who are sitting in the little booths, (which they have largely done away with) please try to stay awake and when someone asks for assistance or information, perhaps you could help them. I know, I know, it’s irritating when people expect you to actually work for your paycheck, but that’s life.

To the MBTA management, I say, “What the f***?” How is it that you’re billions of dollars in debt and yet you keep spending money on things that don’t improve service one iota? Our fares go up and up and service gets worse, the trains are filthy and overcrowded and the fare evaders have more ways than before to elude the system. One of my recent pet peeves has to do with the change of fabric on the seats on the Orange Line. Why would you get rid of the vinyl and replace it with a fabric that cannot be wiped down? Besides being a grotesque pattern of colors and swirls, it’s almost impossible to tell when it’s wet and with the bed bug infestation in this area, I can’t help but think it’s conducive to those pests. And what’s with the noxious odor at North Station?? The whole place took years to renovate and yet there’s something dripping from the ceiling and burning the floor akin to the creature's blood in ALIEN. Add to that the overwhelming sulphur stench and I feel like I need a HAZMAT suit whenever I’m there. Lastly, I’m really confused about the role of the Transit Police. Why is it that they are never on the trains (unless there’s a bomb scare – and yes, we’re not stupid – we know when those dogs are sniffing our bags, it’s for a suspected bomb that you didn’t tell us about) ? It appears that they are in squad cars driving around the outside of the stations, when the majority of crimes happen on the T or on the platform (like the inebriated folks who fall into the tracks and get hit – might be helpful if someone were around to prevent this sort of thing). We have real police for the streets, so the Transit Police should be on the trains or at least in the stations.

HEY FELLOW RIDERS! Just a few things; please don’t clip your fingernails on the T (This is a relatively recent occurrence that has cultural implications and makes me want to distribute a document with tips on public etiquette for newcomers.) Don’t carry on a loud conversation (in any language) with your buddy who is half a car away, don’t squeeze your gigantic body into the seat that you cannot fit into so that you suffocate and maim those of us who are next to you. Please cover your mouth when you sneeze, cough or yawn because no one wants your germs or bad breath. PLEASE GET OUT OF THE DOORWAYS when people are getting on or off the train. Please use copious amounts of deodorant in the summer. Please keep your backpack, purse, bag, etc. from ramming into my rear, back, side and front. Please do not talk to me if you are high, drunk, paranoid, delusional or trying to sell me something like candy bars or religion. Better yet, don’t talk to me. Don’t even look at me. Spare me your sob stories about “trying to get home” and just needing “$12.50” for the train. It’s baloney and we both know that you’re just looking for drug money. One last thing, STOP SPITTING onto the train tracks. What the heck is that about???